I've been posting resources. A good place for resources is ADDICTIONZ, though there are many others and I may post about them later.
Now for my first personal post, I have what my doctor refers to as an addictive allergy to foods--I have a lot of food allergies and tend to be addicted to the very foods that make me sick. It's a physiological problem with psychological manifestations. That is, it's not my "fault" any more than other diseases, it's genetic. But then again, even though I was born with my genes, who am I if not at least my parts my genes. Well, that's another philosophical argument.
I also have an addictive personality in that I have a tendency to get addicted to whatever, alcohol, drugs, sex, behaviors, anything. I don't know if I can blame this on my genes or not, it's who I am or seem to be. Perhaps it's partly the Vishanas, or "Habit Energies." But in any case, it's created lifelong problems for me.
In OA and Al-anon, I have take the first step, and I hereby take it again.
I admit I am powerless over food, alcohol, drugs and other people, and that my life has become unmanageable.
Overeating, wrong eating, personality problems and other issues have been having very negative affects on my life which include obesity and health problems and interpersonal issues. I hereby admit my powerlessness and the unmanagability of my life.
Control is a big issue in my life. I want to control everything. To admit I am powerless over food is hard to do, but it is obvious as I try to diet/be abstinent and fail over and over. For years. I hate the idea of powerlessness, but it is clear when I am honest that I really am powerless over food, and I am surely powerless over other people.
I want to manage my life well, but I continue to fail at that as well.
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2 comments:
Hi Mary,
I'd love to join.
I have food allergies, too. Because of leaky gut syndrome, I can't eat anything with soy, dairy, peanuts, oats, pinto beans, kidney beans, and chick peas. I used to be able to eat these things without a problem. Being vegetarian, they were the staples of my diet. Now, if I eat them, they will trigger my rheumatoid arthritis. I will also start to crave them. I didn't do that before. I can remember when I first started craving them. It was when I was taking care of my mother, and working two jobs. That was also about the time my joints started to ache, but I didn't understand then what was happening to me.
Other foods that I'm addicted to are refined sugars and chocolate, because of their stimulant qualities. I can't take anything that has stimulants. Not even decongestants or antihistamines. I'm hypersensitive and highly addicted to stimulants.
I don't eat any of these foods. Well, except cheese every once in a while. When I say cheese, I mean cow's milk. Goat's milk doesn't bother me, but it's hard to find Mexican or Italian restaurants that offer goat cheese alternatives :[. I'm rambling now. Feel free to post this letter as a comment to your first personal post, if you think it might help someone. I'm looking forward to participating. -lori
I used to be a vegetarian also, and developed allergies to soy and beans and dairy--I have so many allergies I had to give up being a vegetarian! WAHN! I didn't want to.
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